Tuesday, May 31, 2016

Lord Shiva and achhe din through Gangajal (satire)


Lord Shiva was not happy. He had just got the news that people are drawing up plans to make money out of something that is nature’s gift.
Durga saw him pacing up and down in front of his cave in the Himalayas with his disciples Nandi and Bhringi crouching behind a clump of bushes and could guess that Lord Shiva worried.
‘What is the problem now?’ she asked. ‘Did you not sleep well?’
Shiva stopped his pacing and stood in front of Durga.
‘This is not good,’ he said.
‘What is not good?’
‘Those people down there want to make money by selling that which comes for free.’
‘What is it they want to sell?’
‘Water from the River Ganges – they want to package it and sell it to the people. They have taken up the task of cleaning the River and, I think their funds have run dry. So they want to sell its waters to generate funds.’
Durga laughed.
‘I think you forgot that some other country is already selling fresh air. It’s a seller’s world and the demands of people keep changing.’
It was at this time that Ganesh joined them.
‘If you ask me, it’s a good business proposition,’ he said. ‘The demand for the holy water is tremendous. There is a ready market not only here but abroad also. And – I hear that they will market it online. And, the project will also help boost the morale of postmen.’
‘Postmen?’ both Shiva and Durga said together.
‘Yes. Right now all post offices are dying. No one sends letters or telegrams or money orders and the morale of the staff have reached rock bottom. Hence they need a morale booster.’
‘You mean to say that the morale booster will come from Gangajal?’
‘Yes because it will be sold and distributed through post offices. Moreover, it will spawn a new range of products for packaging. The delivery process could be subcontracted to drone operators. The possibilities are unlimited.’
‘You mean acche din through Gangajal?’’ Lord Shiva asked.
‘Yes,’ Ganesh said. ‘And – there could be foreign experts involved in the process. That is today’s tradition.’
‘By the way – where are they setting up the water purification plant?’
‘In Varanasi,’ Ganesh said with a smile.
‘I knew,’ Lord Shiva threw up his hands in despair. ‘They can’t see beyond their noses.’
‘And – they will be going solar,’ Ganesh added. ‘The distilling plants will run on solar and gobar – the pair of alternate energy.’ (to be continued …)


Image courtesy wikimediacommons.org

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